Rock among Clouds

As Chaucer was the lily among thorns, it is my place to be the rock among clouds. My life is gloriously full of expansive minds, driven souls and big ideas on two feet. To be surrounded by so many empassioned thinkers, those who seek greater impact in the world through their own unique venues is a wonderful place to be. The continual whirlwind of creativity and exploration of the inner workings of human expression is a beautiful thing to behold. Though, I wonder, how did I get here? Among these people? These minds? These hands that are shaping lives and the world around them? How lucky am I to get to be a part, however small and steady.
 
Please do not misunderstand, this is not a lament, it is a wonderment. I am gratful to be a part of this ...these multifaceted communities. Full of juxtapositions of callused hands and big ideas, young bodies with old souls, old bodies that will never cease to have a child's wonder. You see, I am a simple creature, with simple dreams and desires. Happy with my life, and content with the progress I am making towards my goals. A slow grower, if you will, in a garden full of Jack's bean stalks. You know there is gold at the top, giants to slay, harps to be rescued, and I am an avid listener of the tales that are told. Pleased to be the audience for the bards. In their world, but not of it.
 
Or so I thought...
 
Until one of my whirlwinds reminded me that wind doesn't make a sound without a rock to blow over.

Suffer to Succeed

There is an age old adage, "You must suffer to succeed" which was taken to the next level with the phrase "The more you suffer, the more you succeed." While this particular reference was in regard to sports, it is easily applicable to so many areas of our lives. Well, perhaps just my life, where I tend to over indulge in the things I find pleasurable and forget to manage the things that keep the wheels on this crazy bus. 

How do you choose to suffer? 

How do you set aside those easy things and choose the harder path, strewn with the rubble of those who didn't reach their mountain top? Knowing that there is hard going ahead do you grant your every whim until the starting gun? Do you start small and conquer mole hills before mountains? Do you do the odious tasks first, then get to the ones that seem less awful? In my ever so limited experience, I don't believe it matters HOW, just that you do choose. 

We suffer to succeed, because we want more than we are. As parents have said since the first protozoa left for Single Celled Organism University- "we want more for you."  It is the nature of the evolving human to desire the best of and for themselves. The truly enlightened seek it spiritually. Perhaps someday I will travel to the Zen Mountain Range and make that particular journey, at present I am seeking more temporal rewards - greater strength, longer throws, better household management, more well trained animals etc. 

Am I prepared to suffer to get what I want? Willing to set aside my desire for the perfect pair of heels that looks just like five other pairs in my closet so I can pay off more of my never ending student loan debt? Willing to get up before the sun to sweat it out in the gym? Willing to forgo whatever television show I am currently obsessed with to do tedious chores that never seem to stay done? Willing to suffer to succeed? Most days the answer is yes. 

On the days when I run far enough to catch a runner's high, or we all fall exhausted on the mats in the Junkyard, or when Tukko and Remi (my beloved beast hounds) actually sit and shake before coming in the door, or when debts disappear off the monthly roster, the suffering is worth it. 

How do you choose to suffer? How can you not, when you want to succeed? 

Do More To Be More

Loving both sports and travel, it was only a matter of time before I tripped over the TV show Dhani Jones Tackles the Globe. Veteran NFL player spends a week learning a new sport in a new country, then competes to see how he fairs, all while exploring the country and culture is the basic premise of the show. Sounds like a blast, right? Through the infinite powers of the Internet I discovered a book by Dhani on the show, Dhani Jones: The Sportsman. To say I enjoyed this book would be a wild understatement. This book made me laugh, think and reevaluate some of my choices and options for future paths, in my sports and else where. Give it a read if you are so inclined. However, that fabulous little piece of nonfiction isn't the topic of today's post, just the source, as it will be for several additional posts.

"The more you do, the more your become."

Think about that for a moment.

The more you do, the more you become. Simple, true and mildly profound. The more you choose to experience, the more you are. The more you explore the greater opportunity to discover your strengths and weaknesses. By allowing yourself to adventure, the greater chance of finding your passion or purpose.

Eight plain words that advise us to go forth and experience more of the world than our small sphere of existence. A consequence laid out in barest terms for how to get beyond your garden gate.

While not all of us are millionaire TV personalities with the backing of a private television network, we can explore. Adventure can be had if only you know where to look. The sheer number of local festivals, historical sites and museums could fill the roster of even an experienced traveler.  The chances to test your physical boundaries are too numerous to catalogue.  Being so spoiled for choices the real trick is figuring out where to start!

Of late I have taken a slew of different style dance classes, and toyed with exploring the circus arts. Learning how to do some of my own home repair has been a real kick in the pants. I now know for sure a few things I am not cut out for, and it was fun to try! In some cases it is as simple as reading books outside my normal realm of fluff and fantasy (see above). Next on the list is fully exploring the city I live in, there is bound to be culture here somewhere, right?

What will you do to discover what you will become?

Comfortable Silence

The space between words can be a cavernous expanse, the width of which can drown you in your own fears. Halting steps from one vocalization to the next can as you to trip over your mental shoelaces. A driving need to fill this void can be seen in our daily lives, the amount of media we consume and allow to consume us. The meaningless mouth noise made to avoid the dreaded gap. Inability to pause, and enjoy the silence.

On a rare occasion, silence can also be as easy as breathing. As suited to you as your favorite jeans, smooth over the knees and fitted to the curves. When paired with the right partner the need for words vanishes and you settle into a calm understanding of enjoying one another without the need for verbalization. The clamor of the exterior world slides out of your skin, leaving only you within. A sense of peace, not easily achieved alone, and to be savored when shared with someone you trust enough to allow yourselves that uncommon familiarity.

We constantly crave peace, but actively seek it jumping from one thing to the next, rather than permitting ourselves to enjoy it once found. Learn to recognize that gift of trust. Embrace the silence, the peace that comes with shared existence without the continual flow of information. The quietude will grant you better insight than all the research and jacked-in technology you could hope for.


"Words like violence, Break the silence, Come crashing in, Into my little world, Painful to me
Pierce right through me" - Enjoy the Silence - Depeche Mode

Never Again

As we trip along in life we collect and create so many bad habits and self damaging mental traps. Below you will find a short list of things I have picked up and it is time to shed, like funky gym socks after a Texas Summer run. There are also concepts that I have already ditched that I am vowing to never pick back up, no second helpings on these little pity pies. 

• Sit down and eat a whole pizza again/pint of icecream/double bacon Whataburger

• Wear a 2XL shirt again

• Have a pants size that starts with a digit higher than 1

• Be 'smoking drunk'

• Dispair that my strong legs won't fit in skinny jeans

• Grumble that my powerfully built ass won't allow me to wear a pencil skirt

• Attempt to fulfill other people's ideals for my body image

• Have a body weight that starts with a digit higher than a 1

• Allow other people's negative lifestyle to change mine

• Disparage someone's efforts to improve themselves just because it isn't the path I would take

Mental Mirror

In the latest incarnation of our ever evolving B I discovered something that has to go - the negative. The continue whine and bitch fest of my internal monologue is now done. We will get glad in the same damn pants we got mad in. (Thank you, Tommy, for that little gem of a colloquialism)

This means rather than fussing about the dishes, I will remember the wholesome meals I shared with the folks that helped me create that pile of mess.  Instead of moaning about the unceasing routine laundry, I will endeavor to recall the hot Texas Summer moments that created the need for so many dirty socks. As opposed to lamenting the arduous parts of animal care and maintenance (cat box cleaning and pooper scoopering the back yard etc), grinning at the antics of my pets and celebrating puppy nose art on the back door.

In addition to flipping those items around in my mental mirror, I will also use those fun house mirrors to show folks what I see in them. Translation, more positive outward displays. From more verbalization to people that make the daily difference in my world, to reaching out to those that may think I have forgotten how important they are.

Simple stuff, right? It should be, so I choose that it will be. 

The little things

The little things...

As children we collect little things, in our pockets, in jars, in shoe boxes under the bed. These treasures are the ones that caught our eye, that our roaving fingers couldn't leave out there, that we wanted to see again, so we stock piled them. Buttons, rocks, leaves, bits of string, pressed flowers, the occassional fallen birds nest, the tiny animal bones that nature sometimes leaves behind. Avid explorers of the three feet closest to the earth we tucked them away in our secret places. Innumerable such items met unfortunate ends in our washing machines, only to be washed away with soap bubbles.

Our love of the little things never really goes away. It may morph into other particulars: dishes, linens, thank you notes, good pens, wind chimes, charms, scrapbooking stickers. The concept remains the same, small things that make us smile. The items that fit in your hands and make you smile each time you see them. They draw a fascination or memory to the fore front of your mind that gives you back your sense of wonderment for just a moment.

Take a moment to explore the world closer to your feet than your head, remember where you left your shoe box full of pretty acorns, and never let go of the little thngs.